Caring for the Dead: Your Final Act of Love

By Lisa Carlson.

Reviewed by: Meg Wickes, Hospice Volunteer.

Because so many have asked to know more about their available options around the burial and funeral arrangements for their loved ones, we searched for and found this little treasure in the Winslow Public Library to support them in their decision-making.

This well-written volume, encyclopedic in its scope, provides a valuable resource and reference on matters that take center stage at the time of the death of a family member. For many this would be its primary usefulness, one which might better be anticipated before decisions are forced by events.

However, much more than a compilation of useful facts, this is a book with a compelling point of view. For the author the final act of love means avoiding all commercial funeral and burial arrangements in favor of personal, "home grown" ones. She starts with her own experiences in providing these services on the death of her husband as a final act of love. In most states, she says, the law allows the family to provide the plain pine (or possibly even cardboard) box, transportation of the body, and cremation or burial without recourse to a funeral director.

This is the author's second book on the subject. However, she acknowledges that her enthusiasm for circumventing the professionals is not at the present time widely shared. She has provided information, including state by state legal stipulations on all aspects of the care of the dead person, information that any of us who have contact with the dying could benefit from knowing.

Part One provides general information of the subject, some of it from a historical perspective, as well as touching personal anecdotes. Part Two provides the essential information for the fifty States of the USA. In Part Three crematories are listed, medical schools that accept body donation as well as burial societies along with directions for starting you own, even down to earth suggestions for how to be a good neighbor when death occurs and much more.

Whatever one's personal views, the book makes fascinating reading, providing a window on the pitfalls and satisfactions of personal burial arrangements for the uninitiated and an essential guide for those who plan to take this road.